Being Selfish

Ok...after all that flooding of horoscope stuff, I think I should minimise the horoscope stuff I put up here. Bad thing about being a Pisces, the more I "learn" about myself, the more emotionally unstable and depressed I get. Haha. So yes, high time to cut down on the horoscope stuff.

Been meaning to do a daily reflection kinda thing here, but I realise my life is so empty now I don't know what's there to reflect on.

I have my business, my friends, my family, but somehow it still feels so empty. I realise I don't have a person who belongs to me to share my life with. Maybe that's why I want to find a partner, cause then I know there is someone who belongs to me (maybe also his family and friends, but me being his priority) and who will not think of another person more than he thinks of me; something like me being the second most important person, 1st being himself, haha.

I guess it sounds really selfish if I put it this way, but yes I really think I am a selfish person deep down. Sometimes I try not to be selfish and appear generous cause I don't want to be too possessive or too pushy and let others dislike me. But with age, sometimes you just can't be bothered what others want to think or feel towards you. I mean seriously, who in this world will love you as unconditionally as yourself? Even parents, they will still be distracted by other siblings, the other parent, their own parents, and of course, themselves. And sometimes I really start to believe that if you treat others too nice, they will take you for granted, so at the end of the day, you should treat yourself the best, thereafter, you start to care for the special someone, so that even if they do take you for granted, you did not mistreat yourself.

Sometimes, enough is enough, you really shouldn't force yourself to make everyone's life better at your own expense. Living our own short short life is tough enough, why try so hard to live so many other life of the people around you, especially people who don't treasure you, people who don't value you the same way.

Say I'm selfish, but life's just far too short for us to spend so much time for others and eventually regret on our death beds.